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The Happiness Theory

   The Happiness Theory

The Happiness Theory

Everyone wants to be happy, because happiness affects all the activities of your life. Mostly, when you are happy, it reflects in your work as well. Your performance remains at its peak when you are happy at work. On the other hand, when you are under stress or anxiety, your performance is affected. So, your happiness is directly connected to your performance. Even if you are pursuing activities like writing, painting, etc., happiness still affects the quality of the results. So, being happy is important. So I have created a Happiness Model which can improve your overall happiness proportion in your life.  

The Triangle of Enduring Happiness

Happiness is an inner aspect of the body, but it depends on some external factors. So, I have created this triangle of happiness, which has 3 main vertices: Health, Work, and Connections. These three vertices can have a great influence on the happiness of any person. There can be some other factors that are responsible for happiness for some people, but these are the most important ones.




Health:

Health is one of the most important factors for happiness. Having good physical as well as mental health is important for enduring happiness. So, keeping your health in good condition is very important. Regular exercise and yoga can improve both physical and mental health.

Work:

Your work can also impact your happiness. Essentially, you should love what you do. There are three kinds of work involved in our lives: professional work, our hobbies, or making our hobbies our work. Everyone has different scenarios of work in life.

  1. Some people love their work and do not pursue any hobby, but they can still be happy because they love what they do.
  2. Some people do not like their work but feel happy pursuing their hobby. For example, John works in a bank, despite not being passionate about it, but after work, he writes poems, which is his main source of happiness.
  3. Some people make their hobby their profession, such as someone who loves writing and becomes an author.

So, it’s different for each person when choosing their work. You should choose your work based on what gives you happiness.

Connections:

This part involves the people in your life, including your friends, family, and even people who are neither family nor friends. Time is not constant for everyone in life. Ups and downs are prerequisite events in life. When you feel down, it directly affects your happiness. For example, if you fail an exam or fail in business, such events affect your happiness. So, if you have people in your life who can support or encourage you in such situations, it can reduce your recovery time.

We all know the famous quote by Jim Rohn: "You are the average of the five people you spend the most time with." So, having positive people around you is an advantage for happiness as well as improving your life.

But it’s not limited to just your family or friends. You can also find happiness by simply helping someone who is neither family nor a friend. A simple act of kindness can bring you happiness. Doing something for others without expecting anything in return can still make you happy.

So, these are the vertices of the happiness triangle that we can control to stay happy in life.

Habits to Stay Happy

Regardless of the triangle, there are some habits that can also help you stay happy.

  1. Be grateful for what you have in your life. That doesn’t mean you should stop dreaming and working. You should work toward your goals with a positive mindset.
  2. Enjoy the journey of achieving your goal. As discussed, you should not connect your happiness with any destination or result of your goal. You should enjoy the journey too.
  3. Another way is to focus on what you can control in life instead of things you can’t control. Some events truly affect happiness, which are out of our control. For example, you should not get frustrated just because you are stuck in the rain while coming from the office—this is not within your control. So, develop the habit of accepting the things in life that you cannot control. This will help you stay happy.

 

Yesterday, I met one of my best friends who bought an expensive car last month. I thought he was so happy. When I started discussing his inspiration for buying such a car, he told me a small story. He said that he set the goal to buy this car 2 years ago, and the goal came true. I said, "Now you are a happy person," and he said, "No." This was an unexpected answer for me, but he started the real story. He said, "I have felt empty since the day I got this car. Yeah, I am happy, but not as much as I imagined during the journey of getting this car."

I returned home and started thinking about this incident. I found some information on the internet based on this situation. This situation is called the Arrival Fallacy. Arrival Fallacy is the belief that once you complete your goal, you will achieve enduring happiness. This term was coined by Tal Ben-Shahar, who has a Ph.D. from Harvard University in Organizational Behavior.

You can't be permanently happy if you attach your happiness to short-term or materialistic things. So, it's important to connect your happiness to things that are truly permanent or can be with you for a long time.

Methods to Deal with Arrival Fallacy

So often, we see people connect their happiness with achievable goals like buying a car or getting a dream job in a specific organization. They always think about the destination and believe they will be happy once they achieve this goal. In most cases, however, they start feeling empty after achieving their goal. This is called Arrival Fallacy.

How to Deal with Arrival Fallacy

First of all, it's great to have dreams. But don’t completely rely on your dreams for happiness. Instead, you should start enjoying the journey, regardless of the end results. Here are some ways to deal with the Arrival Fallacy:

  1. Set a New Goal: Once you’ve accomplished one goal, set a new goal. This will keep you motivated to achieve the next goal.
  2. Set Meaningful Goals: Align your goals with your core values and aspirations, not with the success benchmarks of others.
  3. Embrace the Process: Start enjoying the process of achieving your goals. Don’t just focus on the end result.

So, these are some techniques we can use to stay happy in life. These may not be the ultimate methods for happiness, but they can play a major role in your happiness.

Thank You.


  




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